Morning Conversations With My Son

(In the car on the way to school.)

Son: "Eww. This cinnamon toast is gross."

Me: "How could it be gross?"

Son: "It's cold, and I can taste the butter too much."

Me: "I barely put any butter on it. Try folding it in half to eat it."

Son: (folds toast in half) "No, it's still gross because it's cold."

Me: "Put it in front of the heater and heat it up."

Son: "Oh great, now the cinnamon and sugar blew all over me."

Me: (in a high pitched girly voice) "Oh you are so sweet! You smell just like cinnamon and sugar!"

Son: "Mom..... I always smell like that."

Me: (noticing the left turn arrow was green) "Stay green! Stay green!"

Son: "Push it Mom!"

Me: "I'm going as fast as I can, considering this big turn I have to make."

Son: "Tip it! Drift! Go on two wheels!"

Me: "No thanks."