Wednesday, January 06, 2010

Athiest's Ten Comandments

After reading Bunc's "Athiest's Ten Commandments", I decided to make my own list. :P I'm not an athiest myself, and I don't follow these (had to throw that in for people who don't know me who might happen across this) .

1. If thou are athiest, thou shalt only believe in science and data. Only believe that which can be proved by the scientific method. Exceptions would be: the big bang theory, evolution, global warming, etc.
2. Feel free to worship any man made things such as luxury cars, speed boats, Ipods, etc. Be sure and include money in that list.
3. Christians don't take the name of God in vain, but Athiests will be more concerned about not taking the name of the current liberal president in vain.
4. Only take a day off if you are sick of work, have a hangover, or have paid vacation. Afterall, if the world was created in a big bang, no rest was needed.
5. Honor your father and your mother, but remember they were just genetic donors, and someday they will be dead and gone.
6. Thou shalt not kill, especially convicted murderers. However, an exception would be unborn children.
7. Thou shalt not commit any more adultery than is practiced by any former U.S. president. Remember, some things don't count as "sex".
8. Thou shalt not steal openly. Cheat on your taxes, yes, but don't get caught. ;)
9. Don't bear false witness against your neighbor. Everyone else is fair game, but not your neighbor. :P
10. Don't covet your neighbor's belongings, and especially his wife. You wouldn't want alimony payments anyway.


Sandy@American Way Farm said...

That's good food for thought!

Ramana Rajgopaul said...

Nice. Very nice.

Bunc said...

Funny! The best humour is absurd humour and it certainly meets that test D.