Sunday, September 06, 2009
Mamas Don't Let Your Children Shop Online
My 11 year old came in a little while ago and we had a conversation that went something like this:
Him: "Mom, can I order some hand spikes? They are only $20 including shipping."
Me: "Hand spikes?! What are those?"
Him: "They are like these gloves that have spikes on them and you can climb things."
Me: "I don't think I want you having something with dangerous spikes on them."
Him: "Can I get a war axe then?"
Me: "War axe!!? No...no war axes for our house."
Him: "Well, can I get a sword cane then?"
Me: "Sword cane?! No, I don't want ANY weapons in our house."
Him: Well, how about a shield. Can I just get a shield?
Me: What are you going to do with a shield. 'Mom, I'm going to walk the dog, I'll be sure to take my shield with me.'
Him: (laughing) Yes! At least I wont' get shot.
Me: I don't think a shield is going to stop a bullet.
Him: Are you kidding!? A lead shield will stop a bullet.
Me: How are you going to carry a lead shield?
Him: "Well how about some throwing knives? They have a set of 15 for $20."
Me: No way! I don't want you throwing knives!
Him: Well can I get an air soft gun then?
Me: Where are you coming up with all of these things?
Oldest son: (to youngest brother) Wait, tell me: If you could have anything in the world, what would you want.
Youngest son: (quite determined) A gladiator helmet.
Me: Gladiator helmet? Where do you come up with these ideas?
Him: Let me show you on my computer.
Me: Just tell me about it.
Him: Oh, wait, this one can't be shipped to California.
Me: I bet MOST of those can't be shipped to California.