Sunday, May 31, 2009

Jon and Kate

Okay, this is a weird topic, but I have been watching the show Jon and Kate plus 8 over the past couple of years, and the recent events have really troubled me. I'm not a die hard fan, but occasionally while I'm working in the kitchen I turn it on. I don't know if you watch that show, but here is what I have been thinking about the situation.

When the show first started out, it was interesting, and they were interesting people. As the show progressed, they started to show them squabbling a little. When asked about it, they replied that they didn't have time to politely discuss things, so they just fired away what they were thinking, and they both knew that it was just the stress of the moment. But as the shows went on, I noticed this happening more and more. And I noticed that the comments became more demeaning. Then I noticed that when something went wrong, the one parent would blame the other, and never admit their own guilt in the situation. Pride entered in, and it also became a question of control. Now I know the show is produced, so much is left out, but there were clear cases of this. I could literally see how their relationship was deteriorating. Statistics would probably say that having multiples would cause the deterioration. But I could see that it had more to do with disrespect between them, and control issues, than the fact that they had 8 kids.

I have noticed the tabloids on the stands that made claims that Jon cheated on his wife. I also saw tabloids that claimed she cheated on him. I don't put much stock in those stories. But I have watched some interviews with Kate that have led me to believe that there are some serious problems in their marriage. I feel that in some ways Jon has been emasculated. He used to be an IT analyst, but now is a stay at home Dad. His wife has started her own career, so often travels while he stays at home taking care of the children. His wife has alot of control issues, so he has to meekly follow what she wants, or listen to a tirade. I feel like in the midst of this show, he has lost some of his identity. That doesn't excuse bad behavior on his part, but I do think it was a contributing cause. On top of all of that, the paparazzi are driving them crazy.

I watched an interview with Kate's brother and wife. They said that they felt the children were being exploited. The cameras were in their life too much, and it was all for the money. I understand their parent's desire to take advantage of the opportunity to make money to support their 8 children, but I feel the price they pay could be detrimental to their family. One statement the sister inlaw Jodie made has really stuck with me. She mentioned that sometimes the kids have the cameras so much in their life, that if they get upset about something, the camera automatically zooms in on them in a moment when they might want some privacy.

The problem I see is that they just recently bought a new home that was very costly. I don't know if they have paid it off, or are in the process. But if they haven't paid it off, they need this show to continue to make the kind of money they need to pay it off. If it were me, and I wanted to continue the show, I would cut back on episodes, and set clearer boundaries regarding my children. I also would schedule family outing when the cameras weren't in attendance. If I were Kate, I would come back home and let my husband go back to work. It really is important to the male mind to feel that they are taking care of their family.

Quite frankly, even though the show's ratings were incredible on the night that Jon and Kate discussed their marriage problems, I think this whole situation will lead to the death of the series. People don't want to see a troubled marriage. They want to see happiness and love. It's depressing to watch 8 children and know that their parent's might divorce, and think about the impact it will have on the children. And the younger the child during the divorce, the worse the child is impacted by it. You can't make me believe that those youngest children won't blame the divorce on themselves. Even the world teaches that multiple births cause a high rate of divorce. I feel sorry for those little children, and for the parents too. But I don't think the world really wants to see that unhappiness.


Nene said...

I agree with what you are saying. I never watch the show because I can't stand to watch this woman act this way towards her husband.

Christina Bess said...

I have to admit I'm a fan of the show, but I do agree with everything you're saying. I don't like how she treats her husband and I think sometimes the "fame" that came with the show went a little to their heads, especially Kate's. I do think you're right they should plan some family time WITHOUT the cameras, but depending on where they go, if they let the cameras go, they get in for free.

I hope they don't divorce, however, they didn't really seem like they wanted to be on the same couch in the series premiere.

Ramana Rajgopaul said...

I have not watched the show, but quite what will catch the imagination of the viewer is difficult to predict. One of the most successful plays was and continues to be when rerun, Who is afraid of Virginia Wolf. The similarities are startling from what you write. So, the show may just keep plugging away.

Amber said...

i agree with you wholeheartedly! I also think it is really hard to live your life on tv, this lead to trouble in a lot of families, like the Hogans, the Osbournes, etc. I didn't know until this new gossip that he had quit his job, and I agree that it probably really hurt his self-esteem and sense of identity. It will be really sad if they end up getting divorced, I think that Kate has the same problem a lot of women today have, which is not appreciating their husbands more and being thankful for what they have!

Amber said...

I watched them for 2 hours last night and it just made me so sad I want to cry. It makes me want to scream at the tv and tell them to just work it out and remember that they love each other! But then again I don't know what's going on when the cameras are off. Still its so sad how much divorce is so prevalent these days, doesn't anyone stay together anymore? :(